I made a decision this morning to quit smoking. Not for health reasons necessarily although I know that will be a definate benefit, but really just because when I am smoking I end up thinking 'why?' to myself all the time. It really isn't 'fun'. Why am I spending so much money on something that really isn't that enjoyable.
Well I think that until the next time I want a cigarette. It's only been an hour and I've already reached for my cigarette case three times. There's nothing in it, I haven't given in yet, but the reflex is so automatic. You don't even realize it until you try to stop, how often your body just does that like it's on auto pilot. Those aren't the hard times though. They're coming. Those are just the automatic I'd have a cigarette now type things. I haven't started craving it yet. We'll see how long this lasts. It would be nice to say, oh I just have to be strong, but I'm not even about to try to fool myself into thinking this isn't a tough habit to break. Especially not after nearly 25 years of doing it. I did quit once for 2 years. And another time before that for a year. Hey, if I can even quit for that long again it would be good for me.
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