Tuesday, June 26, 2007

One plus one plus one plus....

The main HBO series I watch is back on for it's second season now. 'Big Love' is a story about a man with three wives. The fundamentalist Mormon practice of plural marriage--poligamy. Now I'd always heard of the Utah fraction of Mormons that practiced plural marriage but never really knew anything about it. Watching the show has really been enlightening. My main question every time though is 'why'? It's just not easy. Think about it. Marriage just between two people is difficult even at its best. I can't imagine bringing more people in on it.

Last night they had a special before the actual series. A two parter, one right after the other, but it was the first part that was really interesting. It was about the actual practice of poligamy, and had several actual women involved in plural marriages in real life on to discuss how their real experiences related to the show itself. Most agreed that it was quite similar. There were also some decenters, some who had at one time been involved in the practice of poligamy, and a few who were just against it period. Even they for the most part said the show was a fairly accurate view of that life, both for those living in 'compounds' (sort of the Mormon equivilant of the old hippie communes), and those living on the 'outside' in Suburbs as the main family of the series does.

I had to laugh though when one of the actresses who plays a wife on the series said that she's had people come up to her and thank her for showing the 'reality' of such a marriage and that it's not 'all fun and games'. I suppose the idea if not the real practice of plural marriage is something a lot of guys think about as something to be aspired to if they could. If it were legal. From a guys point of view it could be fun. Lots of sex with different women... but it's not just about the sex, just like any marriage isn't just about the sex. When the honeymoon's over it's a lot of work and that's one point this show does drive home. I wonder how many guys like the show? It would kind of kill the dream for more than a few I'd think.

It really is kind of enlightening too though, to see how wide-spread the practice still is even in the 90's, and to hear that there is a grass-roots campaign to lift the law banning plural marriage. Although a government leader explained on the special that they do not go after men, or families involved in plural marriages so long as they're not breaking any other laws it is still a practice that requires lots of secrecy for the entire family envolved in it. Fear of retaliation from community members outside the fundementalists, fear of retaliation in schools for the children of such marriages which usually number in the tens and twenties and some even higher within each family unit. It's still a very touchy issue. I can't imagine the practice of plural marriages ever becoming accepted amongst the general population, but then again, who knows?

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