Everytime I leave the idea of writing for publication behind me for awhile, and it happens every now and then, when it just gets to be too much of a hassle (and that's putting it mildly), when I come back, I find getting back in the groove easier/and harder at the same time. Each time it seems that much easier because I still have the 'lessons', contact ideas, many of the websites, and the knowledge of how to, how not to, etc still etched in my memory. It usually only takes a few days to jog it loose. At the same time it's harder and harder each time because instead of starting slowly, learning, finding resources, and developing leads as you would when you first start out, it's all pretty much right there, and suddenly you feel overwhelmed by all the prospects and work to do.
No matter how hard, or easy it is, the one fact remains: I can't stay away from it for long.
I'm a writer.
I may never be famous. I may never be rich. I will always be a writer. It's not 'who' I am... it's what I am. I can deny that from time to time, and I've tried, but you can't run from what is embeded in your soul. You can try to squelch the words, but somehow they will find a way to come pouring out--you may as well just give in to that. That's one lesson I learned a long time ago.
It still gets to be too much at times and a break is fine. I've been asked by people, both casual aquaintances and close friends and relatives when I'm going to write again during those brief hiatus'. My answer is usually, when I have to. Of course that doesn't mean financially as some of those who don't know me may assume. It means when I can't control the flow any longer. When I have to.
Being back does feel good, and I'm sure it will feel good for quite some time. When it comes again that I have to leave to save my sanity (no snickers I do have some sane moments) I have no worries. At some point I'll be back. You can't leave what's inside behind. It's not something that disappears. I have to explain that some times to friends or relatives.
It seems as if they think if you're not writing for a spell, it's gone and you don't have it anymore. Like some magic fairy comes and takes the gift of creation away... lol, well I don't think so, at least I haven't found that to be the case.
I hope not anyway. Now I feel like looking over my shoulder for some mysterious and angry little fairy flitty about trying to stike me dumb with her wand. (No comments about how she must have already hit me a few times. haha)
For the time being, my little (benevolent, kind, generous) fairy sits patiently waiting for me to gather my wits once more and delve back into the mirky waters of the publishing world.
Peek-a-boo... I'm back again, and it's so much easier/and harder than the last time.
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